I have been thinking about a post I read early this morning on The Other McCain that originally started over a ridiculous OP-ED piece on how all Fraternities should be closed down as they only encourage young college aged males to rape young woman. But that is post for another time.
Stacy then found his way to an article about how many women get married anyway even though their gut is telling them something else. An article in Marie Clare talked about how much of this has to do with the fairy tales we tell our young daughters and as they grow they watch the romantic comedies that come out of our Hollywood culture saying that love conquers all.
While much of Stacy is discussing is the personal responsibility that is being taken away and this article is creating almost a victimhood mentality of young women due to these influences that most young women grow up with. What Stacy has completely overlooked is the culture that we have created for not only ourselves but for our young girls. Divorce is the answer.
We no longer have the reason to make our marriages work. We no longer have the reasons to listen to our guts as we are waiting to walk down the aisle and that little voice is saying RUN AS FAST YOU CAN IN THE OTHER DIRECTION. We can simply go through the motions because for a relatively small amount of money and short waiting time we can just start over. The divorce rate in our society is far too high.
43.7% of custodial mothers and 56.2% of custodial fathers were either separated or divorced. And in 2002, 7.8 million Americans paid about $40 billion in child and/or spousal support (84% of the payers were male).Stacy asked the question:
Amanda Clark got a $15,000 gown and a 7-carat ring, and she still wasn’t happy, so whose fault is that?
Was it really the fault of her husband being the Wrong Guy? To believe that, you must believe that somewhere out there is the Right Guy, ready and eager to wed Amanda Clark, except for the fact that she goofed up and married the Wrong Guy. But shouldn’t we at least consider the alternative hypothesis, that Amanda Clark was to some extent responsible for the failure of her own marriage? Isn’t it possible that she was the Wrong Woman?
It may be that Amanda is the wrong woman, but what is also possible is that Amanda didn't care that he was the wrong guy, because she could just get that quickie no fault divorce and find the "right guy". Part of the lie that feminist movement has hoisted on our young females (and males for that matter) is that divorce is so common that it has almost become a right of passage, and if you are being made to feel that you are not being understood or are not reaching your potential in all your glorious womanhood you can get up and walk away, it isn't that big of a deal. Self fulfillment is the far more superior objective than actually taking your time and marrying the right person
I am not trying to say that people are not making a difficult choice or that they don't even attempt to work on a marriage, but the divorce rates being as high as they are we must ask ourselves what makes one go through with a marriage if you are not feeling right about from day one? Marriage is very hard work. You have to compromise, you have to give up some things that at one point in your life you considered very important. You have to put your spouses feelings at least as high on the totem pole that you put your own. You also must accept the fact that it isn't going to be rosy each and every day. You will go through patches that are painful and you must be honest about that pain and the causes of it. You also have to realize that all those habits that you think are so cute before you get married aren't really all that cute after you live them everyday year after year. The things that bother you before the wedding only become more pronounced after the big day. We become even more ourselves. You have to work on your marriage like divorce isn't an option. That is very hard work indeed.
What I am saying is that our society feeds the idea that marriage the first time around is just a test run and if your fulfillment in your womanhood is being threatened the answer is divorce. Stacy questions if we woman are asking the question is it us. It isn't that women don't ask is it us, but it is that women are being told even if it us this doesn't feel good and doesn't fit the narrative that we can indeed have it all, we then can just have a start over. Even Stacy didn't ask the question of how damaging the woman's rights movement has been. So I must ask, Et Tu Stacy, Et Tu?